..Aaaaand he's gone.

Goodbye, Leeteuk.

And just like that.. My Teuki is gone. Been crying since late last night, and now I'm extremely bursting with tears. Even though he clearly tweeted to not cry.. I really am crying so hard. I feel like I just sent my boyfriend off to the army. lol pathetic? no. here's why.

So for some people who read my statuses on facebook and my blog posts and tweets and everything, I get the same question.. "Why are you so broken hearted? I mean, it's not like you actually know him or anything. Plus he'll be back." Though these statements are true, because I don't know him personally, and he most definitely WILL BE BACK! Everyone keep this in mind. He WILL BE BACK! By the way let me state that another reason that I am so completely crushed is because my 2 favorite people in Super Junior are in the army now.. Heechul will come back soon though(: And Kangin is already back. He came back in time to do Sexy, Free & Single. YAY! Anyways.. There is a much deeper reason for why I am so crushed and broken hearted that Teuki is leaving when I wasn't this crushed about Heechul leaving. (Which btw, Teuki was completely shattered when Heechul left too).. Think of it this way. Everyone is a fan of something, right? For all the Justin Bieber fans, it'd be like saying "Justin Bieber is going to the army! You will not really see him or hear him sing unless you're on Youtube or you have him on your ipod for 2 years! There will be no live performances, no concerts, no new songs, or anything." You'd be absolutely disappointed, right? (I'm not a fangirl of JB, btw, but I do have respect for him as an artist and some of his songs aren't bad.)

So the deeper reason of why I am so completely heartbroken that Teuki has left is because no matter what I was going through this past year, Teuki was always there. And some people are like "OMG IMMA STOP READING THIS! SHES DELUSIONAL!" Before you stop reading, I didn't mean he was physically there. I meant that ever since I started listening to kpop, I would always turn on Super Junior. And here another comment comes to mind "Well why are you sad, then? There are so many other members of Super Junior who are still left." I am sad because I have always been Leeteuk biased. I have always loved Super Junior ever since I first heard Sorry Sorry many years ago. I would go on Youtube, I would watch every video I could until I almost fell asleep at the computer. I'd watch every music video, every video of Leeteuk dressed in costumes ( LOL ), and especially every video of his laugh. If you read my Celebrity Obsession post on him, you'll see that I love his laugh. But no matter what I was going through, watching Leeteuk doing crazy things or watching him laugh would make me feel like even though things were hard, things will get better. To see him so happy would make me happy. On the same but different note, seeing him cry, would make me cry. Because Leeteuk should not cry. But for the past few years I have had a horrible time. My health has been completely bad. I almost died a couple of times. And I've gone through a huge and horrible break up. I've had a friend die. It's just been bad.. And so since like April of this year, I've been focusing my life on Korean things. And slowly I've found my place in the world. And even though I do listen to A BUNCH of other kpop groups, if you look through my Galaxy S3's SD card, you'll see that most of my songs are Super Junior. And I have many videos and pictures of Leeteuk on my phone. 

Now even though I am completely depressed another main thing that I want to say in this blog is how proud of Leeteuk I am. I think it is GREAT that you're still going to the army after being in that car crash. I'm proud of how strong you've stayed since you've gotten your day to leave to go to the army. I'm just very proud. You're a truly amazing man, and even though I am depressed at you going for 2 years, I'm glad you are. This will be good for you. So after today I'm going to try my hardest not to cry anymore, and just be proud and happy that you are going through with this. I will ALWAYS wait for you, Leeteuk. Even if after your 2 years are done, you decide to not come back. Forever I will be waiting for your comeback. And I know from reading alot of things about you today that I am most definitely not the only one. So come back safe and healthy, okay? That way all of your fans can be completely happy and we can hear your sweet voice again(:

Love, 

Your Biggest American Fan,

Shanea

DO IT! He needs you to do it! He really does!

This one is definitely how I am right now. lol

So thanks for reading my sappy Teuki story. Here are ways to contact me.

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@HAS_Shanea

My email: shaneathekoreanatheart@gmail.com